Mothers.

Yesterday I was standing at an intersection waiting to cross the street. As I started into the intersection I saw a car approaching out of the corner of my eye so I stopped to make sure they weren’t going to hit me. Well I guess the red light and the giant white stop line in the street weren’t enough as the car came to a screeching halt in the middle of the cross walk (a huge pet peeve of mine that normally sends me into a rage). For whatever reason it didn’t bother me too much and I just looked up to give the driver a nasty look. The first thing I saw was a MADD (Mothers against drunk driving) ribbon hanging in the rear view mirror. ‘Huh, I haven’t seen one of those in a while.’ The irony that a woman that supported safe sober driving almost took me out at the knees was enough to give me a chuckle, until I gave her a closer look.


Cigarette in one hand, blackberry and eyeliner in the other hand furiously typing a text with her music so loud I could hear it over my ipod. I lost it…in three instantaneous stages. I went from chuckling about the irony of almost getting hit, to shock of the sheer stupidity of the driver, to a curse word filled rant that would make a sailor cry. I figured she couldn’t hear me and my poetic use of the word asstard (that is an asshole and retard) so I gave her a bang on the hood, and fake “I am getting your license plate number and calling the cops routine”. She was unfazed. My antics proved to be more entertaining to my fellow pedestrians than educational to the driver but that’s ok.

The worst part about the entire incident, besides the humiliation of looking like a raving lunatic in the middle of the street, was the fact that for the rest of the night I had the song stuck in my head she was blaring. Fucking Kanye West, Flashlights. Damn it, I hate that douche bag. You have to be kidding me, the song just came on the radio!

What is the lesson for today? I hope Kanye West’s tour bus is struck by a mother drunk driving and he can never perform again.