Facebook secret code...fake code.

Bring me tickle me Elmo or the wrath of God will come upon you and your family! Ok, the lady I saw at Target today wasn’t that bad, but I thought she was a minute away from pimp slapping the Target employee that said they were sold out of some toy. The women argued that two days ago she was told they had ‘plenty’ and couldn’t understand how now they have NONE! It was like a five year old trying to understand how Marty Mcfly could interrupt the time space continuum. Hell, I still don’t get it.

So I decided that this woman needed to be gently introduced to a little something called equally irrational. I followed her to the checkout line where she was still venting about the incompetent target employees to someone on the phone. After she got off the phone I pretended to take a phone call that had some crucial secret information. Taking careful note of the woman’s age (45 or so) and her failed attempt to be trendy I knew I needed to hit her where it counts, her inflated sense of herself.

The fictional one way phone conversation went like this…’Honey, what was that secret password posted on facebook to get the 50% off discount at Target? So you are telling me all I have to say is “I am a secret santa shopper”? So If I say ‘I am a secret santa shopper I will get 50%’? Its 3:55pm so the deal is only good for 5 more minutes, I better hurry’. Hook line and sinker…bitch.

I then snuck out of line and took up a great viewing point a lane over and just watched the awesomeness unfold. So she tells the check out women the ‘secret code’ and she just looks at the lady like she is nuts. Once the total comes the woman starts to question why she isn’t getting the facebook secret code discount. I am about to pee my pants. After a minute of bewilderment the cashier calls over a manager. The manager tries to explain to the woman that they have never run a promo anything like that. But I am the ‘secret santa shopper damn it’. About ten minutes go by before the humiliated woman storms out and the employees and surrounding customers get a good chuckle ‘no I am the secret santa shopper, no I am!’

You have been irrationalized.