Ready for my massage!

Amaazing!

For months I have been walking by this spa in my neighborhood and they always post weekly specials in their window. Well a few weeks ago they had a poster up for a deal on a couples massage, naturally I was intrigued. The obvious fact about this is that it was going to be a tricky situation to bring up with the little lady. So I went about this very carefully first asking her if she had ever heard of a couples massage, if she ever knew of anyone that had one, and if she thought she would ever be interested. To my surprise she had nothing but great things to say about it so I just let it all out and told her I signed up for one. Man was she excited. I got hugs and kisses and she said that I was the greatest husband ever. I was so freaking pumped I wanted to go right then, and man do I have a kick ass wife! Two days later I walked over to the spa and walked in ready for the best hour of my life. Immediately I saw two people dressed in all black standing behind the counter and just assumed these were the two people that were about to change the way I felt about massages forever.
“Hi, Adam Miller here for my couples massage”. “Ok sir where is the other party that will be joining you today”? “Oh no, just me and my couple. Having some else there would be weird.” “Sir, I believe you don’t know how this works. See a couples massage is when you come in with your wife and you both get a massage at the same time.”

MIND BLOWN!
What the shit? How the hell is this worth double a regular massage? So I have to be in the same room with my wife while Helga, the hot blonde Swedish massage lady, rubs me down all while Hanz, the 6’6” German body builder gets all handsy with my wife? Hell no! What happened to the good old days when a couples massage was a couple of hot Europeans doing a four handed dance on my hot oiled body? What is this world coming to? So I called them liars and told them the sig should say “massage FOR couples”.