I miss Jared

“Chips and a drink?”
“No thanks, just the sandwich.”
“That will be $7.85.”
“Shouldn’t that be $5.00?”

“No, this is a premium footlong, it’s not $5.00.”

“Interesting."

Now I know I am no marketing expert, but something seems a little off here. When I use to pitch design concepts to clients we would highlight the most important parts of the designs. I can never remember a meeting where I said ‘every plant we used is an evergreen’ when clearly 25% of the plan contained non evergreen trees. Maybe if I just make the statement often and loud enough they won’t realize that oak trees are deciduous, and the daisies will not bloom all winter, but then in tiny little letters at the bottom write ‘I have no idea what plants are in this plan and what they might look like in the winter’. People aren’t this dumb to think this would be a good idea…or are they?

Apparently an ass ton of people of at Subway are this dumb. They have decided to come up with an ad campaign that screams at us how ANY (ANY) footlong is $5.00. Which ones? ANYONE! Any, it is a really confusing word to some, so I have to assume they were just given some bad information on the definition of ‘any’. To most of the English speaking world, this would mean that no matter what footlong sandwich you order at a Subway, it will cost you $5.00. To Subway, ‘any’ means a select group that is defined in individual stores.

So I applaud you Subway for trying to single handedly trying to reinvent the English language one bad ad campaign at a time. Bring back Jared.